Most people carry on through life either trying to make people understand their point of view or believing they are right no matter what and become rigid and stuck in that moment. An old Coyboy saying from the West is “Know when to draw the line”. This could be accepting there is no solution to your issue and drawing the line or continuing on with the problem by going over and over it again in your head. Taking the higher or moral ground, by not overthinking the situation allows the energy source that’s depleted or stuck to run out of source.
It’s truly not an easy thing to do as it requires the act of compassion, resolution, and peace. Many people believe if they back down they have lost their stance or argument. but that’s just the “Ego” taking over that little voice inside saying “I’m right and you are wrong”. In order to really understand and to see both sides from a higher viewpoint and allow each other to act, feel and do what they want, not punish, abuse, and make them feel for the rest of their lives they owe you something. There are no justified resentments.
Sadly everything comes to an end at some point, those that are lucky and have lived a life of true love, a supportive family, friends, and jobs are most likely practicing in their own awareness and faith. When it’s a relationship and it’s become toxic, and abusive words, violence, and revenge step in, the only true person you are hurting is yourself. There are five stages to being able to draw the line, the first stage is to ‘forgive’ yourself if it is you that has caused the upset, and reach out to the person and say sorry, now that you are aware of the upset, you can work harder on yourself to become a better person and not act in that way again. Even if you can not say it to that person, write it down as if you were handing them a letter, then draw the line on that moment, turn it back into the light, and watch it grow again in another lifetime.
I once ran a workshop in Australia called “Let’s work together to make it happen”, it was for 20 women that worked in a Spa and hairdressers, but the toxic environment, the constant bullying, and the talking badly of others were affecting the staff and the clients. The owners asked for my help so I took all the staff to a place called “Tamborine Mountain” on the Gold Coast of Australia, a beautiful mountain range, amongst the tropics with a very strong spiritual faith and notion. To comfort and ease the staff I started with a group meditation, then I guided a simple exercise in pairs about trust and intuition. I paired the people that were causing the problem together and switched it around when I could. Everything was going really well until one of the owners turned up late. Within seconds a peaceful and amicable environment became hostile and aggressive. It was obvious in my observation and the change of energy that the problem was actually the two owners, then they had formed a pact mentality with their chosen favorites, ousting the staff they did not want or did not fit in. It was a very aggressive form of bullying that was truly causing emotional distress to some people. By the end of the workshop, some made peace, and some apologized, but those who believed it was their way or no way turned on me.
After this experience, I continued my practice at the spa for another four weeks and witnessed a huge increase in sales, people getting on and aware of their actions, and those that had understood and were ready to draw the line left their jobs and found more suitable employment elsewhere. I too had to “Draw the line” and found another place to run my healing practice so that I was free of the toxic energy. Although the owners did not like my observations and became very abusive towards me, they too understood by the end of it, the need to draw the line, however, at that moment they did not want to change, so they carried on in their bullying and toxic ways and in that situation, there is nothing you can do to help them further, except send peace and love. A year later, the owners approached me as their business was folding, they asked me to run another workshop, and if I wanted to buy the Spa to run my practice. But the owners still did not believe the toxic energy and problem were coming from them, but this time I could truly see with eyes open they were in a place of fear through overspending and living an indulgent life, therefore putting pressure on the staff to make the sale, causing competition and bullying. After a couple of hours, both the owners could see their part, and sold one of the Spas to release funds, and found the courage to draw the line on their partnership, friendship, and pain.
Most things don’t work out, but what does work out is how you manage change and transition. Becoming adaptable to new things coming forward in your life after you have “Drawn the line”, you will feel relief. Even if you are fearful, always know when one door closes, however painful a new door seems there is a great opportunity to start again and embrace the moments in your life when your heart was touched. Everything else that caused pain, see it as a teaching to grow and understand the right way to fit in and be part of a bigger picture in life.
Author Isabella Rose, Excerpt from Awareness Within Book & Training